I couldn’t help it, I started crying. I didn’t know what was going on, but this was a terrible surprise. What did he mean, I was married? I have never been married! I shakily opened the door to the house. I could hear Tom and Bill shouting upstairs. My heart was hammering in my chest as I walked up the stair banister towards the shouting. Normally when they fought, I hid until it was over, but I felt now was a good time for me to inform Bill that I wasn’t married and that I had no idea what he was talking about.
As I pushed the door open I could hear them screaming at each other in German. Bill was an inch from Tom’s face, both boys had their fists balled up. Two identically furious expressions focused on me when I cleared my throat.
I wiped at my face as I turned my attention to Bill.
“I don’t know what this is about, but I have never been married.” Then my face crumpled and I started crying again. Ugh, so much for being the strong female counterpart.
I felt Bill’s arms slide around me. I buried my face in his shoulder and cried. I wasn’t sure why I was crying so much, I didn’t usually get this emotional.
“I’m sorry.” Bill was murmuring while he stroked my hair. I stopped crying and wiped my face.
“Who told you I was married, and why wouldn’t you ask me first?” I was suddenly angry at the person who started this mess.
“Josh sent David paperwork that you had signed, I’m sorry, I should have asked first instead of accusing you.” He looked down at me warily.
“I have never signed anything, ugh, he never even PROPOSED. I will kill that backstabbing lepper!” I was pissed. Josh was forging documents now? Then my heart sunk. This means he had gone to the press. The fans would be heartbroken.
“Bill, oh my god, Josh went to the press didn’t he?” I didn’t look at his face, but I felt his head nodding. I closed my eyes against the tears that streamed silently down my face again.
“Why is he doing this to me?”
“This is what happens. People make up lies to the press to make money. I’m sorry love, I’m sorry.” Bill wrapped his arms around me, squeezing me closer.
Tom interrupted us then.
“We need to make a statement. Jessi, I know you don’t want to be in the spotlight, but you don’t have much choice. I am not going to sit here while this bastard trashes your name. We need to have our reps issue a statement today.” He stood up with purpose and flipped open his phone.
Bill kissed my forehead and nodded in agreement with Tom.
“Yes, we need a statement and a lawyer. Forging documents is a crime and this is slander. I plan on prosecuting to the full extent of the law. No one comes after my wife.” I smiled at his tenacity. I loved it when Bill showed his fierce side.
I wiped the tears away from my face, blew my nose and straightened up. Taking Bill’s hand in mine I turned to Tom and winked.
“Mr. Photographer, I am ready for my close-up.”
The next day was a short course in insanity. Bill and Tom were on the phone with their reps all day while I painstakingly read the articles trashing me online.
“Bill’s Future Wife is a Tramp!”
“Bill’s Wife Already a Wife!”
“Bill Heartbroken as Fiancé Announces Engagement to Another Man!”
Bill finally took the computer away from me.
“This isn’t healthy. You know these aren’t true, and no one will believe them when I am done with him.” He cuffed my chin in his palm and kissed my nose. Then his phone rang and he was off again.
I sighed and sank back into my chair. Now what? I shot out of my chair as an idea came to me. Of course! Why hadn’t I thought of this sooner? It was perfect!
I pulled out my cell phone and started dialing. Josh answered on the first ring.
Josh hung up before I could finish my string of curses. I closed my phone in frustration and slumped back in my chair. What a coward. He couldn’t even stay on the phone long enough for me to cuss him out.
Bill and Tom strode into the room then.
“We have a statement out and a lawyer pressing charges. They found out he got paid $130,000 for the forged documents.” Tom was breathless with excitement.
Bill linked hands with me and kissed my cheek.
“See, by tomorrow all the headlines will say things like, ‘Scammers Try To Ruin Kaulitz Wedding and Fail Miserably.’” His charming smile was irresistible. It was impossible to be upset when he was smiling at me.
“I tried to call Josh to tell him what an asshole he was but he didn’t stay on the phone long enough.”
Bill and Tom’s faces fell. So did mine.
“What?” Bill looked at me incredulously.
“I called Josh?” I was afraid maybe I had done a bad thing now.
“Jessi, now they can say you are in contact. Sweetie, you need a course in PR Training.” Bill exchanged a look with Tom, who rolled his eyes and started up on his phone again.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I just wanted to tell him he was a jerk.”
“It’s ok, Tom’s gonna take care of it.” Bill just smiled and put his arm around me.
“What am I going to do with you? Always causing trouble.” Then he kissed me.
If this was my punishment for causing trouble, I was fine with it.
Tom came back in the room then.
“Uh, Jessi, we have another problem.” Tom shifted his glance from Bill to me.
“The documents are notarized and filed with the state of California. It appears they are real.”
I shot out of my chair.
“WHAT? I never signed anything! I swear on my life, what the heck is going on? How did he get a marriage license without me?! I never married him, I swear to God, Bill I swear on everything!” I turned to Bill now, pleading. My heart was hammering in my chest. I was so frustrated. I didn’t know what Josh was doing, but I felt completely helpless.
“I don’t know. I don’t know, they just said they don’t appear to be forged…they are sending them our way.” Tom walked over and put a reassuring hand on Bill’s shoulder.
Bill leaned forward and ran his hands through his hair.
“Okay, so maybe he had someone pretend to be you?” Bill looked up at me hopefully. I was thankful he was at least trying to give me the benefit of the doubt. This looked so bad for me.
“I guess.” I gave a let out an angry sigh and dropped my head in my hands. “Now what? Now what do I do? It’s my word against his?”
Tom put his hand on my shoulder, “No, it’s our word against his.”
My best friend and I ended up staying the night at Bill and Tom’s house. The paparazzi had staked out my townhouse in town and my best friends flight back to the states didn’t leave for two more days. I was happy to have her there for moral support anyways. Staying at the twin’s house was nothing new. Bill and I had started staying with each other once we got engaged. Which was precisely what I was day dreaming about when I woke up feeling nauseous the following morning.
I was standing in the kitchen drinking tea with my best friend Jackie. The twins would be asleep for a few more hours. We were the only early birds in the house.
“I am letting this situation get the best of me. I couldn’t eat dinner last night and then this morning I woke up nauseous. I hope I feel better after some breakfast.” I blew on my tea a few more times before gingerly taking a sip.
“Want me to make you an omelet?” Jackie was the mothering type, which was good because right now I really needed mothering.
“That sounds delicious.” My stomach was growling already.
I sat on the barstool, brain fried from the events that had transpired the night before while Jackie made breakfast. I was lost in thoughts over how Josh had gotten the documents forged when Jackie slid the plate across the counter.
“Eat up kiddo.” She said with a warm smile.
“You really are the best.” I replied before shoveling a scoop of mushroom-egg-goodness into my mouth.
“Mmm this is delic-
I stopped talking as my stomach started gurgling. As the acid started to rise in my throat I jumped up from the counter and ran to the bathroom. I barely got the toilet seat up before I started heaving.
“Whoa, it’s okay, honey I am right here.” I could hear Jac’s mothering tone as she held my hair back and rubbed my shoulders.
I tried to reply but I couldn’t stop heaving. Then I started crying. It was all I seemed to be able to do lately was cry.
When I finally felt like the nausea was passing I stood up and wiped the tears away, washed my mouth out with water and blotted my face dry. I turned around to find Jackie in the doorway.
“I could kill Josh right now.”
“So could I,” she shifted uncomfortably then continued, “So, uh, want me to make you something else?”
I just laughed and shook my head, “No, I feel fine. I think it is just nerves, you know?”
“Yeah, well you kinda have the entire world against you right now, not to bring up the bad news…uh, yeah. Hey, think of it this way…you could be pregnant!” Then she started laughing and turned back towards the stove to clean up.
“That would be the worst thing that could happen right now.” I laughed back at her and sat back down to make another attempt at eating my omelet.
I finished my omelet without any more issues, and Jac and I sat in silence contemplating the events that were unfolding when Bill came down stairs. He was still in his pajama pants, a lose t-shirt and was rubbing the sleep from his puffy eyes.
“Morning ladies.” He grumbled as he poured himself a cup of coffee.
“Morning.” We replied.
He took a seat next to me on the love seat.
“You know, you never did get your surprise yesterday.” He gave me a sleepy smile before sipping at his coffee again.
“Yeah, I guess I didn’t huh?” I smiled back. “I guess I could use a good surprise right now.”
“Hmmm.” Was his response as he dug in his sweatpants pocket.
“I am going to go upstairs and take a shower.” Jackie interrupted.
I wasn’t really paying attention as she stood up and walked out of the room. I was focused on the single gold key Bill was placing in my hand.
“My surprise is the key to your heart? I thought I already had that.” I joked as I pulled the key out of his palm.
“Hardy har, no that is a key to the house. I was going to take you on a drive through the mountains and give it to you at sunset but our plans changed.” He grimaced slightly at the last part of his statement.
“Thank you honey, but I already have a key to your house. I got one when I first started as your assistant.” I smiled back at him, putting the key back in his palm. Surely he hadn’t forgotten that much, I had been using it for the past year and a half.
“Yes, I know that, but you didn’t have a key as an occupant of the house. I want you to move in with me. I would feel safer knowing you were protected by my security team, and I would be happier if you were here all the time.” He pushed the key back towards me, smiling at the look of shock on my face.
The enormity of what he was suggesting hit me. I knew we would probably move in together once we were married, and we had practically lived together on tour, and especially since we had become engaged. But now, he wanted me to live with him. My heart leapt in my chest and for the first time in 48 hours I felt genuinely happy.
“Of course I will!” I sprung forward on the couch and wrapped my arms around his startled frame. He barely had time to set his coffee down, sploshing a bit on the table. He started laughing at my enthusiasm and returned my infectious embrace.
“I see you finally told her.” Tom’s groggy voice came from the stairwell.
I turned around to see him in his pajamas, walking into the kitchen for coffee as well. His sweatpants were substantially baggier than Bills, and he was constantly pulling them up. I was so accustomed to seeing his underwear by now that it didn’t phase me anymore.
“Hey roomie!” I winked at Tom as he strode into the dining room to sit with us.
“Living with a morning person is going to take some getting used to. By the way, who did I hear throwing up this morning?” He furrowed his eyebrows in concern at me.
“I heard that too, is Jackie sick?” Bill turned to me with the same expression.
I felt the blush creeping up my neck.
“Um, that was me. Just a case of nerves I think. I am not sick, I guess I just didn’t eat much dinner last night and the stress of everything got the best of my breakfast...” I trailed off at the end and looked down at my empty cup hoping it had a better excuse.
“I’m sorry, you feel better now though?” Bill fixed me with a look of concern as he sat forward at my news.
“Yeah, I feel much better. I think it’s just because I didn’t really eat dinner last night.” I stood up and walked back to the kitchen to refill my cup, anything to change the subject from vomit or the current situation with Josh.
“I should check to see if we got the faxes from California yet.” I could hear Tom discussing the legal documents we were waiting on with Bill as I filled my cup with warm water and steeped a fresh cup of tea. I sighed to myself as I stirred in the honey.
When I walked back into the dining room both boys were hovering over fax pages.
“She was in Germany on tour with us during the time this was signed in Santa Barbara, California.” Tom was pointing to the bottom of the page.
Bill nodded in agreement.
“So we can just provide them with proof of that and this will all go away?” I said hopefully.
They exchanged glances.
“I will call the attorney and see what we can do. I don’t think this will stand in court. It’s pretty obvious that you can’t be in two places at once.” Bill smirked as he finished his statement.
I felt a sense of relief settle into my shoulders. Hopefully Bill was right and this would be the end of this silly parade for attention on Josh’s part.
I sat down in front of the TV and picked up the remote. I hadn’t turned on the TV in two days afraid that it would be full of negative media about Bill and I. I was surprised at what I saw when the image came into view.
Josh was standing at a podium having a press conference. My mouth dropped open, and I felt my stomach gurgle again. Right as I stood up to run to the bathroom I heard him say, “I can’t believe she left me when she was pregnant with our baby.”
Bill was rubbing my shoulders as I emptied my stomach contents into the toilet. I felt disgusting. Josh was saying I was pregnant with his child now? This was getting insane. When I felt like I wasn’t going to throw up anymore, I stood up and washed my face and mouth. My lower back was throbbing, so I stretched at the sink before turning around.
Bill was standing in the doorway watching me with weary eyes.
“I think I should make a statement.” I tried to sound as strong as I could.
“We should discuss our options…can I ask you a question?” He looked embarrassed.
“You can ask me anything.”
“Were you ever pregnant with his child?” He grimaced when he said it, so did I.
“No. Josh and I were together for three years and we lived together briefly, but I was definitely never pregnant. When I found out about his affair I left and never looked back. I cannot believe I ever dated him or that he is doing all of this right now.” I shook my head in disgust as the tears welled in my eyes again.
“I’m sorry, we will find a way to make it stop.” Bill urged as he wrapped his arms around me. I could tell he was relieved at my answer.
“What’s going on now?” I could hear Jackie asking Tom in the living room.
“This jackass is saying she left him when she was pregnant with his child.” Tom was explaining as I walked in. Jackie's brown eyes widened as she took in my puffy face.
“Want me to kill him?” She whispered as she wrapped me in a sisterly hug.
I laughed against her soft curly hair, “No, but I am hoping my parents are haunting him right now.”
When she let go of me I felt a bit dizzy. The cramp that hit my mid-section almost doubled me over.
“I feel kind of dizzy. I think I should sit-
I didn’t finish my sentence because everything went black.
“Jessi! Jessi!” I could see the faint outline of three people around me. I felt urgent hands on my shoulders shaking me.
“Call an ambulance!”
“Where is the blood coming from?”
“Her stomach? It's on her pants.”
“Oh my god…”
I rolled on my side as a wrenching cramp ripped through my lower abdomen. I tried to cry out but everything went black again.
I woke up to the gentle sound of monitors around me. Bill was sitting by my bedside with his head in his hands. I tried to reach for him, but my I.V. stopped me. His head shot up when he heard me stirring on the bed.
His eyes were bloodshot and weary.
“Hey.” He reached for my hand and squeezed gently.
“What happened?” I searched his face as I watched a thousand emotions cross his features.
“Jess, I don’t know how to say this.” He ran his hands through his hair as his eyes welled with tears. “You’re two months pregnant, and you might be having a miscarriage. The doctors are doing everything they can to save the baby.” His lip was quivering as he tried not to cry.
I felt a twang in my stomach as the reality of what he was saying hit me. I was pregnant with Bill’s baby? I was pregnant…I started crying with him. I curled myself into a tiny ball and cried until I couldn’t cry anymore. When I couldn’t cry anymore I stared stoically at the machinery whirring around me. If I lost this baby, I would kill Josh. I would kill him if it was the last thing I did. I wrapped my arms protectively around my belly and prayed.
I must have fallen asleep again because when I woke up it was dinner time. A jolly nurse was setting a tray up in front of me.
“Hi sweetie, you are already getting your color back.”
“Thank you.” I mumbled as I adjusted my bed upright. I kept one hand on my lower belly instinctively.
“The good news is that the bleeding has stopped and your cervix isn’t dialated. It appears that you have been a bit stressed out lately? You need to just take it easy honey or you will lose that little munchkin of yours.” She smiled back at me as she opened up my tray to reveal mashed potatoes, roast beef and green beans. There was also a side of Jello.
“Thank you.” I smiled back at her as I hungrily scooped up a heaping spoonful of mashed potatoes. I suddenly felt ravenously hungry. I inhaled everything on my plate, including the Jello before Bill, Tom and Jackie came striding into the room.
“Look who is finally awake.” Tom smiled wearily at me.
“Hey sweetie.” Jackie smiled.
“I’m glad your appetite is back.” Bill winked at me.
I just blushed in return a I dabbed at my mouth with a napkin.
“So what is this business I hear about me being an uncle?” Tom quipped in an effort to bring a laugh.
“Yeah, I guess I am going to have to find a wedding dress with an expandible waist.” I rolled my eyes at Jackie who smiled back at me.
“Good news love.” Bill squeezed my hand.
“What is that?” I sighed back at him, I was ready for some good news.
“First of all, the baby is safe. Second of all, we are having a baby!” He grinned ear to ear before leaning forward and kissing my cheek. I grinned back at him.
“You’re not upset? This couldn’t have happened at a worse time.” I let my smile falter as I recalled the past few days events.
“Well, actually there has been a bit of excitement about our friend Josh.” Tom rolled his eyes and smiled as he stepped toward my bedside.
“I might not have to kill him after all.” Jackie laughed.
I felt a smile spread across my face. This had to be good news.
“Holly apparently got jealous over the false announcement about the pregnancy and stepped forward. She gave a press conference an hour ago stating that she forged the documents and that you were never actually married.” Jackie was rushing through the news in excitement.
“That paired with our reps statement that you were on tour with us during the time you were supposedly getting married to Josh, pretty much squashed all of his credibility.” Tom finished.
Bill squeezed my hand as I smiled in relief at the news.
“So it’s over?” I smiled up at Bill and squeezed his hand back.
“Kind of.” Bill shifted his glance back at Tom who looked at Jackie who was the only one with guts enough to look back at me.
“Well, someone from the hospital laboratory kind of leaked the news about you almost miscarrying, and since Josh made the announcement this morning about the pregnancy now the media is suggesting that you tried aborting his baby.”
“Oh this is ridiculous.” I sighed and leaned back against my pillow.
“You know what? I think I need to make a statement. Give me Bilde’s number.” I turned to Bill and held out my hand for his phone.
“Honey, I think you need to take it easy and let us handle this for the next couple of days. You are on strict bed rest for the sake of our baby.” Bill affectionately patted my tummy.
“Also, I upped security now that we have a baby on board. I can’t be taking chances with my future niece or nephew. Babies are a great way to pick up chicks.” Tom smiled and winked at me.
“Wow.” I rolled my eyes at Tom and shook my head. Something’s would never change.
“You are not using my child to pick up women.” Bill sternly scolded Tom.
“Whatever, that sh*t works.” Tom laughed and ducked as Bill tried to shove him.
“I could always make a statement.” Jackie’s statement silenced the twin’s rough housing.
“I am her best friend. If anyone knows what’s going on in her life, it’s me.” She shrugged non-chalantly and looked up at the twins.
“That’s actually a really good idea.” I nudged Bill’s hand. “Have Jackie make a statement about what a low-life lying pig Josh is, and that he almost caused me to lose your child. She could say that we were waiting another month before announcing our pregnancy…even though technically we didn’t know…” I finished my sentence laughing to myself.
“Jackie, would you mind doing this?” Bill turned to her. “I understand if you don’t want to step into the spotlight.”
“If it helps you two lovebirds, I would be happy to do it.” Jackie looked from Bill to me.
“Well then, now that this is all settled…you are going to name the baby after me right?” Tom smirked at me before I threw my pillow at him.